As you might have noticed from my post last week, last Saturday marked the one-year anniversary of our first date. Ah, so now you begin to do the math and you realize…Justin and I have only been together for a year at this point, and we’ve been engaged for 4 of those months. So yes…we dated for only 8 months before he proposed.
In comparison to many of my friends/acquaintances’ relationships, I realize that this is a rather brief amount of time. I have had a good deal of skepticism pass my way since our engagement was announced, and I do try to take it in stride. My favorite is when people congratulate me/us and say how much they can tell that we are in love, etc…and then they ask the inevitable question…
“So, how long have you two been together?”
“Just about a year now…”
A look of confusion/surprise crosses over their face, and I typically hear something like, “oh…wow!” or, “you didn’t waste much time, did you?”
Sigh.
So, this begs the question…how long is long enough to “know” that someone is the person you are meant to be with? Is there a specific amount of time that must elapse before you officially are bequeathed with the ability to determine this? Is there a little alarm clock that suddenly “goes off” in your head to let you know that enough time has passed, and you are officially allowed to consider marriage? I think not. Some couples are together for years before a proposal, some just a few months. My parents had a shorter courtship than Justin and I, and they have been happily married for years! And, on the flipside, I know other couples that were together for years before they were married as well! That is the beauty of life, right? At least, I’d like to think so! Love comes in so many shapes and forms, and what is right for one person isn’t necessarily right for others.
I’d like to just throw it out there that I personally focus on how much my fiancé and I are in love, not the amount of time we’ve had together. If you have been with your significant other for years, and you are still as madly in love as the first time you met, that is fantastic! Or, if you have only been together for a short time and you are still feeling the butterflies…that is wonderful as well! I know I still get them.
So…here’s to love! J Enjoy it.
Katie, totally have been following your blog and this post struck a cord with me.
ReplyDeleteGav and I got engaged on our year anniversary. Not much time in the scheme of things, but when you know, you know!
I found your blog through weddingbee. I know what you mean, my husband and I were engaged pretty quickly but we kept it a secret because we didn't plan on getting married until after we graduated anyway. I like your writing, I'll be sure to check back!
ReplyDeleteGreat post and topic! Rick and I were friends for 2 years, but I knew I felt much more than friendship from the first time I met him. He took a while to catch up! But we were together for 3 years before he proposed and we got married on our 4 year anniversary of dating. However, we were living together and basically acted like an old married couple after only dating for 6 months. We knew, we just waited to be more financially sound and so I couldn't inherit much of his debt. I agree completely that it shouldn't matter the amount of time you're together whether short or long. Its the quality of relationship that counts and matters :)
ReplyDeleteKatie,I knew from the day I started dating my boyfriend that I wanted to marry him! I moved here to Kentucky after a year of dating without a ring and you wouldn't believe the comments that has gotten me! I'm with you! Timing is different for everyone!
ReplyDeleteI'm with you! Ryan and I had been together just a year and a month when we got engaged. There isn't a set date that's acceptable....it's totally up to the couple and what feels right to them. My cousin Abby dated her husband for a month before they went to the courthouse and got hitched....they're going on 6 years of marriage now (they were only 21!), and they are one of the happiest couples I know. Here's to whatever is right for you!
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